The Says Empire Presents
Shit SonomaSays
Wine-country opinions you can wear. Every product description is a tasting note, because we take our merch as seriously as we take our Pinot.
11
Products
5
Categories
100%
Snarky
T-SHIRT
Hot Take
Your Cab is Mid
A devastating verdict for $200 a bottle
$34.99→
HOODIE
Wine Snob
Allocation List or Die
The sacred hierarchy of cult wine access
$64.99→
CAP
Valley Rivalry
Sonoma > Napa
A statement cap, not a conversation starter
$29.99→
T-SHIRT
Local Knowledge
Dry Creek > Dry January
Geography over deprivation, always
$34.99→
T-SHIRT
Local Knowledge
I Survived 12 Turns at Sonoma Raceway
The track that humbles even champions
$34.99→
TOTE BAG
Wine Snob
Pinot Noir is a Personality
For people who know which vineyard block
$24.99→
T-SHIRT
Wine Snob
Terroir is My Love Language
Some people say flowers. You say soil composition.
$34.99→
HOODIE
AVA Pride
Russian River Valley State of Mind
Where the fog decides the wine
$64.99→
T-SHIRT
Valley Rivalry
This Valley is Better
Fill in your own valley. You know which one.
$34.99→
T-SHIRT
Valley Rivalry
Wine Not War
Diplomatic tensions over terroir
$34.99→
CAP
Hot Take
I Put the 'No' in Vino
For the designated driver with opinions
$29.99→
⚔️
The Other Valley Has Merch Too
Equally snarky. Arguably more expensive. Definitely more pretentious.
Shop NapaSays Merch →